Missive From Lucas, Ofanite Of Gabriel


To Senir, Ashkenaz and Kallai, c/o Despatch, The Volcano

I know I promised to write to you all as soon as I could, but I never seem to find the time to slow up, if you know what I mean. There's always something new to do or see, it's wild and strange down here. And they talk funny, like.

I ought to explain slow to you, it takes some getting used to. The best way to find out is to ask a Malakite about honour, or to get a Seraph to define "Literal Truth" and, like, listen until he stops talking. Or wait until he stops talking, anyhow. That's what slow feels like, ouch.

Well, I'm under the wing of a way cool Malakite called Nat (or Nathaniel for long), to stop me screwing up too badly. Well, he tries to stop me screwing up, anyway, but he is a little bit slow sometimes. He's developed an amazing twitch since I teamed up with him, experiencing the "child within", I guess. He's "showing me the ropes", although this seems to involve steel and cutting and burning things more than ropes, as far as I can tell. There's so much to learn, it's SO much fun.

He's a Malakite with a mission (aren't they all) and I sort of see his point. There are so many bad things out there, just waiting to happen to someone. There are things about being corporeal that they just don't tell you about. Whisky, urrgh, don't get me started. Let's just say it's an experience. Remind me to tell you about Case...

If you think that Malakim are all work and no play, then you MUST have met Nat. I think he's taken a vow of "Sneak around wearing a trenchcoat, scowling" and "hit people very hard with metal" or something, the amount of effort he puts into it. I would try and emulate him, but I think I might strain something, and it would probably be Nat. I don't know how he puts up with me, but I am trying. He tells me that frequently, so I think he likes me...

What does "Punishment detail" mean?

Mart is a classic Kyrio... You never know who he's going to show up wearing next. If a pigeon in the area is acting kooky, he's probably got something to do with it. I wonder what it's like to fly in a vessel? I'll have to ask him the next time I see him. He never seems to stand still, either, but he does have natural advantages.

By the way, it's true, mortals DO take liberties with the truth!

They don't seem to be able to go a day without lying. "Love that coat, Jack. Have a Nice Day!" It's all new to me, I mean, what isn't, I don't have a talent for it, but I might have to acquire one. When people ask if they look OK, you have to just say "yes". And they don't really want to know how you are...

You have to admire Bernie, I mean, it's hard enough for the rest of us in the corporeal realm, but there must be a ringing in his ears to drown out everything else. He's pretty relaxed for a Seraph; you know how noble they are. He knows the meaning of tact, which is unusual.

Tony makes his ears ring loudest of all. Like all Mercurians, the apparent truth is less important than making things work. He could talk his way round a corkscrew, and still make sense. I guess he would give a Balseraph a headache. He's OK, I'm wary of the Hyenas, after the way they treated the boss, but I think he's different. Wish he'd drop that notepad, though.

Case. 'Nuff said. I don't think I've been here long enough to even attempt to describe Case. Let's just say there's probably a file a foot thick in Dominique's filing cabinet, full of things he can't prove. I think it's safest to leave it at that...

The other Malakite is called Zebediah. He's about as out of it as I am, and a sure shot with a crossbow. I think he bought his car the last time he was Corporeal. It is an Ofanite Torture Chamber, and does 0-60 in 3.2 weeks. I'm still chilling from the last time I was in it.

Motion seems so much more real here, maybe because everything's so solid and HEAVY, it's like a miracle that it moves at all. You can be really creative, move around different ways.

Talking of creative, I met Eli, and he gave me a motorbike. Joy...

You guys will love my bike, it's sleek and black and chrome and fast and loud and cool and hot and wild and polished and quick and here then there and back again... you understand? I want it to go that little bit faster and it does, every time. Eli is a bit wacky, but he knows what makes us soar.

Anyways, I'm fitting right in down here, doing well. At least I think I'm doing well. Does anyone up there know what "Ferret Shock" means?

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